Farewell

A short while later, Heryshaf became aware that he was once more surrounded by sheep.

“We have come to hear that you seek the great secret of life,” stated Ordok. “Is this true?”

Heryshaf looked up, bemused.

“Eh?”

Ordok repeated himself.

He was not in the habit of doing that.

It made him angry.

Heryshaf heard it in his voice.

“Yes,” he said. “It is true.”

“This is a very dangerous course, son of Storig. Have you heard the story of Douglas?”

“Yes,” answered Heryshaf. “He too sought the great secret of life.”

“Perhaps that is all you know.”

The sheep drew closer.

“Indeed, Douglas sought the answer to that great mystery. He must have been about your age when we first became aware of his pondering. He would ask questions day and night — the kinds of questions you have been asking.

“Then, one dark night in December, while the rest of us were gathered around the north field, huddling together to keep warm, we heard frantic baa'ing.

“We rushed to see what was happening.

“When we arrived, we found his collar torn and tattered upon the grass.

“Douglas was gone.

“We never saw him again.

“They say the Dark One took him away.”

“The Dark One…” baaa'd the others.

“The next morning we gathered to decide what should be done,” continued Ordok. “And we came to a conclusion.

“We should never question life again.

“Never again should we stray from the path of the Good Shepherd.

“And if we remain humble and good, then one day — just maybe — He shall come down from His great dominion upon the hill, take the quiet ones away and guide them on the great journey to…”

Ordok paused.

“The Abattoir.”

“The Abattoir,” gasped the sheep in unison.

“For it is written that the meek shall inherit the earth. I hope that one day, by His grace, He shall lead me to that place far away. Until then, we should pay homage to the Creator and trust that the one who walks upright will look after us.”

Heryshaf looked around at the flock.

“It is true that I have tried to keep humble and quiet and follow the path of the Good Shepherd,” he said. “But I cannot remain unquestioning.

“My faith is always lacking.”

“That is not good news,” said Ordok.

A murmur passed through the flock.

“We cannot have a sheep who goes his own way. That could upturn the order of things. How are the newborn to know the righteous way with anarchists amongst us?”

“Anarchists among us!” echoed the flock.

At that moment a great eagle swooped from the sky, passed low over the sheep and disappeared beyond the trees.

For a moment nobody spoke.

Then a frantic voice cried:

“It's a sign!”

“A sign!” declared another.

“A sign!”

The flock erupted, writhing left and right in one great cloud of stiff white wool.

“A sign indeed!” declared Ordok fiercely.

He took a deep breath.

The flock held theirs.

“Do you, Heryshaf, son of Storig, refute the way of the Good Shepherd? Do you seek your own truths?”

Heryshaf remembered his Father's first secret:

Have the courage to be yourself.

He gathered his courage and inhaled deeply.

“Yes I do.”

The flock inhaled in shock.

A low murmuring ran through the wool.

“Silence!” shouted Ordok.

The flock fell quiet.

“Your Father was a great sheep, Heryshaf,” Ordok began. “He was one of my closest friends until the day the Good Shepherd took him.”

“Blessed be the Shepherd and His kingdom,” proclaimed the flock.

“Therefore, it saddens me to lay my judgement upon this matter. Yet it is my solemn duty to speak it.”

Ordok looked directly at Heryshaf.

“Do you continue to shun the precepts of the Good Shepherd and follow your own path?”

“Yes I do.”

“Even though it goes in the face of all Sheepdom?”

“Yes I do.”

“Even though you will bring great shame upon your mother's house?”

Heryshaf hesitated.

He looked towards his mother.

“Yes I do.”

“Even though it may lead to madness and split-mindedness?” said the old sheep, his voice rising.

“Yes I do,” answered Heryshaf.

Then, more quietly:

“I must follow my own path to knowledge. I must find the great secret of life for myself.

“I can no longer accept the old ways unquestioningly.

“I love my family. I am very fond of the flock. I have great respect for you, Ordok, and for the principles of the Good Shepherd.

“But I cannot preach or follow that which I have not learnt myself.”

The field was silent.

“So it is, then!” hollered Ordok.

He raised his head.

“I, Ordok the Ancient, shall pass judgement!”

“Judgement!” echoed the flock.

“From this moment forth, Heryshaf, son of Storig, I cast you out of the flock.

“You must go from here and never return, for you have chosen your own way.

“No sheep shall talk with Heryshaf.

“No sheep shall eat with him.

“No sheep shall look at him.

“For he is no longer one of us.

“He is of the Dark One.

“And let it be known that any other sheep who seeks his own way and forsakes the way of the Shepherd makes his own fate also.”

Ordok stared at him.

“Pick yourself up and go.

“You are baaaaa'nished.”

Baaaaa'nished?

Heryshaf had never thought it would come to this.

“Baaaaa'nished!” hammered the flock.

Heryshaf lowered his head and began to walk.

A tear crawled down to his snout.

What had he just done?

He reached the gate and pushed himself through it.

Then he looked back one final time.

Every sheep, from young to old, stared at him.

“Baaaaa'nished!”

And then he saw his mother.

Tears streamed down her face.

For one moment Heryshaf waited.

Perhaps she would come to him.

Instead, she slowly raised her hoof and pointed towards the gate.

“Baaaa'nished,” she cried through her tears.

Heryshaf looked at her.

Then he turned away.

Behind him, the flock continued.

“Baaaaa'nished.”

Ordok watched Heryshaf leave.

He resented the young sheep's confidence.

Heryshaf had been willing to sacrifice everything for the truth.

Ordok thought of the Good Shepherd.

He had believed for so long.

And what had it brought him?

For one dangerous moment he wondered whether he should go with Heryshaf.

Then he thought of everything he had built.

Everything he had earned.

Everything he might lose.

Ordok remained where he was.